There’s Something About 2016

It appears as though 2016 will go down as one of the worst years in history for the majority of the nation. I have never in my twenty-eight years seen so much vitriol heaped upon a unit of time. Everyone’s statuses over the last few weeks have been to either curse this year in all manners of ways or to express tempered relief that the year is coming to a close. The year of our lord two-thousand and sixteen has given us all our share of shit sandwiches, but is it more than usual? I can’t call it.

I think all of this complaining about this year is humanity’s weird way of finding comfort and unity. Nothing brings people together faster than a common enemy, and 2016 has risen like Batman to be the scapegoat that the United States of Gotham needs right now. I think a lot of people are struggling with the truth of our reality, and hating this year is something tangible that they can hold onto. Blaming the year for everything that has gone wrong is the only way some of us can make sense of what has happened and find a way to hope for better. If it’s 2016’s fault, maybe there’s a way that we make it out of this unscathed.

Trump’s impending presidency does worry the shit out of me and there seems to be death and destruction everywhere I look, but I can’t bring myself to hate this year in the way that so many others do. I didn’t get rich this year. I didn’t get any new material gain. I took a couple of trips that were fabulous spiritually but disastrous for my finances. I missed out on a potentially good job opportunity in a spectacularly Icarus-like fashion. I definitely got a few wins (hello, Thread at Yale!!), but nothing was externally momentous this year. However, everything changed about who I am and how I look at myself and the world. This was a building year, a teaching year. I had to take some falls to learn that I could get up. I had to sit still when I felt like running so I could face my lessons and past hurts head on. I had to take the time to be broken down internally to prepare me for the shit that’s coming.

This new era we’re about to enter into? It ain’t for the fucking birds. Shit is about to get real and quickly. It’s already starting. We’re going to have to start being about the shit we’ve been saying, otherwise we may all die. That’s not hyperbole. The challenges we’re facing, not just as a country, but as a planet, are huge. We will all be tested in some way.

I think that’s why this year wasn’t bad for me; it prepared me. It tested me on everything. Some tests I know I passed, others I know I’m still struggling with, but I’m grateful for the fact that I am here and I am learning. I was lucky enough to go through trials that have strengthened me for more challenging ones. I’m so thankful for the hard shit this year because it forced me to be better and it reminded me that in order to fight the greater battles I believe I can succeed in, I have to have the humility and patience to fight the small ones.

I think 2016 may have been a preparatory year for all of us. I urge you all to review all of the tough things that happened to you this year. Examine it closely and ask yourself why that might have been present in your life. What lesson could it possibly be teaching you? How can situations, good and bad, be a reflection of you? Be vulnerable with yourself! See if you can handle exposing your innermost self to your own eyes and accepting what’s there. Challenge yourself to love every inch of who you find. It’s hard because we’ve learned to hide and dislike parts of ourselves–sometimes, with good reason! But hiding it and not facing it brings us no closer to fixing it. Sometimes, the fix is realizing that the thing you’ve been hiding and hating is not the problem at all, instead the problem is identifying the source of the shame that you attach to it and ridding yourself of that lie. Take the time to fully self-assess and open yourself to new ways of thinking and being.

Whether you felt that your year was fabulous or a fail, I hope that you all find love, strength and focus to keep you going in 2017. I hope we can all come together to fight for a world that lets us be as authentic as we dare to be.

And if you’re reading this, that means you’ve supported me at least once, and I’m so grateful. Thank you for taking the time to read my thoughts or watch my videos. It only gets bigger from here.

xoxo,

Natali Nicole